More life ponderings...
Dec. 22nd, 2017 12:01 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
annwfynIn other news, for various reasons I just read through 12 years (with a gap in the middle) of my end of year reviews.
I was moderately amused by some of the themes that have come up. I note:
• Every single year I explain how I’m going to be more healthy this year. I’m not going to obsess about my weight. I’m just going to think healthy. In 2005 I was going to start jogging, I note, which was an idea of such spectacular optimism that I laughed out loud, and then remembered that I last tried to do Couch25k in 2015. Apparently it took me ten years to accept I’m not a jogger. In 2011 I was doing sit ups and aerobics in the living room. Oh, Sally…
• I seem to have had a lot of years of radical change, with house moves, jobs, death etc. I count ‘Death’ as my card of the year three times, at least. I think maybe I need to accept that ‘a lot of things changed’ doesn’t make a year unusual. It makes it a year. Shit happens.
• I have a 50% track record of being cautiously proud of what I’ve achieved job wise, but looking for something newer and bigger in the future and a 50% track record of viewing my job as a total disaster zone. And I think 50% of the time, the jobs I’m being proud of in the review of the year have turned into the disaster zone I’m recording in next year’s annual summary. I shall bear this in mind when making future job decisions.
• About a month before the Cataclysm of life disaster, I announced proudly that this year was going to be the year of the Lovers, resolving my life woes and finding tranquillity and balance. Apparently I bring balance to my life, like Anakin Skywalker brings balance to the Force.
• I keep saying I’m going to let go of anger and just value my friends and relationships. I think that means I’m not letting go of anger. But I think I change where it is directed. I note, I wrote a long spiel in 2006 about letting go of the past and not holding on to old hurts. There were clearly specific references to something there. I’ve no idea what. So…I guess that’s worth remembering – whatever is winding me up now will almost certainly be a confusing footnote to Sally of 2027.
• 2005 Sally was super smart! I found the entry where I wrote ‘I’m afraid I’m letting my inheritance money dribble away. I should buy a house’. Past Sally, you were wise! You gambled on the London housing market and won. Present Sally thanks you profusely, from her lovely warm cosy flat in Glasgow.
So what have I learned?
I shouldn’t expect to be a size 12 any time soon, I need to be sensible about job stuff and it’s always a good idea to put money in property.
Now, onward! The new year awaits….
I was moderately amused by some of the themes that have come up. I note:
• Every single year I explain how I’m going to be more healthy this year. I’m not going to obsess about my weight. I’m just going to think healthy. In 2005 I was going to start jogging, I note, which was an idea of such spectacular optimism that I laughed out loud, and then remembered that I last tried to do Couch25k in 2015. Apparently it took me ten years to accept I’m not a jogger. In 2011 I was doing sit ups and aerobics in the living room. Oh, Sally…
• I seem to have had a lot of years of radical change, with house moves, jobs, death etc. I count ‘Death’ as my card of the year three times, at least. I think maybe I need to accept that ‘a lot of things changed’ doesn’t make a year unusual. It makes it a year. Shit happens.
• I have a 50% track record of being cautiously proud of what I’ve achieved job wise, but looking for something newer and bigger in the future and a 50% track record of viewing my job as a total disaster zone. And I think 50% of the time, the jobs I’m being proud of in the review of the year have turned into the disaster zone I’m recording in next year’s annual summary. I shall bear this in mind when making future job decisions.
• About a month before the Cataclysm of life disaster, I announced proudly that this year was going to be the year of the Lovers, resolving my life woes and finding tranquillity and balance. Apparently I bring balance to my life, like Anakin Skywalker brings balance to the Force.
• I keep saying I’m going to let go of anger and just value my friends and relationships. I think that means I’m not letting go of anger. But I think I change where it is directed. I note, I wrote a long spiel in 2006 about letting go of the past and not holding on to old hurts. There were clearly specific references to something there. I’ve no idea what. So…I guess that’s worth remembering – whatever is winding me up now will almost certainly be a confusing footnote to Sally of 2027.
• 2005 Sally was super smart! I found the entry where I wrote ‘I’m afraid I’m letting my inheritance money dribble away. I should buy a house’. Past Sally, you were wise! You gambled on the London housing market and won. Present Sally thanks you profusely, from her lovely warm cosy flat in Glasgow.
So what have I learned?
I shouldn’t expect to be a size 12 any time soon, I need to be sensible about job stuff and it’s always a good idea to put money in property.
Now, onward! The new year awaits….
