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annwfynThis is a totally random piece, that comes from my pondering last night. Five life hacks, built on five objects which help me fake being a grown up. Because I'm pretty convinced I've never achieved actual grown up status, and I suspect never will. But with these simple tricks, I can do a fairly good impression of one. What are your life hacks? How do you create the appearance of adulthood?
Life hack lesson one - always have a dishwasher
I lived have lived without a dishwasher. In fact, I've had a dishwasher for a considerably shorter period in my life than I haven't. I think it's no coincidence that I've never managed to regularly cook, keep a nice kitchen, or, in fact, keep a nice house without one. Basically, I loathe washing up. It's a tedious chore, it saps the joy out of a nice meal at the end of the day, and it's not something you can do quickly, so I always end up putting it off until I've got the time, and then I wind up with a depressing and icky kitchen. Dishwashing machines, on the other hand, are quick to load, reduce hand washing to a couple of saucepans, and mean I have a constant supply of nice clean plates and cutlery, clean surfaces and the kitchen is a pleasant place to be and a reasonable environment to cook in.
Life hack lesson two - find one or two cook books and learn to cook from those recipes
This is slightly random, and a late learned lesson. For years I just thought I was an awful awful cook. I got into my thirties not learning how to cook and finding it all super incomprehensible and completely beyond me. In retrospect, a lot of this came from my having this slightly bizarre perception that everyone else could just....cook. They magically knew how to look at a bunch of stuff that happened to be sitting in the kitchen and would say "this will make a stew. I'll just add some herbs" and all that felt hugely beyond me. The reality, as far as I can tell, is that actually, pretty much every starts with recipes. And, more than that, I think for me what helped was realising that it's way way way easier to start with one cook book, or equivalent.
Most cooks seem to design their recipes based on a few simple principles. Those are not always the same principles - some may love roux sauce as a base, others are big fans of 'if in doubt, add something to mayo'. And switching between a load of different cook books or random recipes on the internet is harder as you're constantly having to learn new tricks. Whereas if you stick with one writer, you can pick up their core foundation stones and build from there.
For me, my primary cook book is my Gousto folder (which is like a cook book). Gousto, itself, was a massive help in terms of getting me cooking by sending me boxes with everything. Now I am more sporadic in getting the boxes, but the recipes I use near daily. And they work for me. I know the building blocks behind that particular philosophy of cookery and I generally don't mess it up. I would also add Rose Elliott - Not Just A Load Of Old Lentils which is the first cookery book I had as a teen and used to cook with when mum was alive. And those are my basic building blocks of cookery. They are the recipe writers I've been trained to follow. I do not pretend to have an intuitive grasp of food.
I just know how to do what I'm told and a couple of paths to follow.
Life hack lesson three - write stuff down
This is probably the faddy bit of my list of lifehacks. See, I've found, that for me, my bullet journal was a total game changer. Mostly because it wasn't electronic. It wasn't an app. It was a physical object that sat in my bag and I physically wrote stuff down in it. The act of physically writing made the to do lists, and good habits more concrete, and to cross them out felt like more of a definite act of failure than just deleting something out of a spreadsheet or word document. The limited space meant I had to be more realistic about what I could commit to doing and couldn't write 20 item to do lists, but then had to see them through.
This structure gave me a way to manage my life, a way to manage my diet, to not double book as much, to manage finances, and to take medication regularly. Generally, all the things I've been bad at. I mean, it drained my finances with my mass purchase of stickers but I do like making it look pretty too, and the process of doing that means I'm regularly taking stock of my life and being mindful about how it hangs together. All that is good.
I know bullet journals are a bit trendy and don't work for everyone, but they really really work for me.
Life hack lesson four - use a night light
This probably only works for people who have nightmares or assorted sleep related crazy, but I think this is genuinely a massive thing in terms of managing my mental health. A soft night light sounds kind of childish (I know some people who genuinely seem to find them almost offensively ridiculous) but for me they provide me with the capacity to get a good night's sleep (v important) while also giving me enough light that I am not badly shaken or disoriented when I wake up from weird dreams. Which means I sleep, and wake up sane.
It's a really little thing, but I'm told it's not that unusual for people who suffer from nightmares or vivid dreams and it really makes a massive difference in managing my crazy and keeping me stable.
Life hack lesson five - own a string of pearls
This probably just my being incredibly middle class, but I love my pearl necklace (shush! No sniggering!). It's a silly thing, but I love the look of it around my neck. It makes me feel grown up, and oddly, it makes me not worry about my grey hairs or the fact I'm a bit podgier than I used to be because pearls make me feel like that is distinguished. It makes me feel like I'm aiming to be a Dowager Countess (Maggie Smith, you're my role model here) and that's cool enough. And then I feel competent and content with being older.
That kind of confidence is worth way more than the pearls. I wear them for big meetings at work, for interviews, and special occasions. And I always feel better when I wear them.
So, those are my random life hacks and objects that help me pretend to be an adult. What are yours?
Life hack lesson one - always have a dishwasher
I lived have lived without a dishwasher. In fact, I've had a dishwasher for a considerably shorter period in my life than I haven't. I think it's no coincidence that I've never managed to regularly cook, keep a nice kitchen, or, in fact, keep a nice house without one. Basically, I loathe washing up. It's a tedious chore, it saps the joy out of a nice meal at the end of the day, and it's not something you can do quickly, so I always end up putting it off until I've got the time, and then I wind up with a depressing and icky kitchen. Dishwashing machines, on the other hand, are quick to load, reduce hand washing to a couple of saucepans, and mean I have a constant supply of nice clean plates and cutlery, clean surfaces and the kitchen is a pleasant place to be and a reasonable environment to cook in.
Life hack lesson two - find one or two cook books and learn to cook from those recipes
This is slightly random, and a late learned lesson. For years I just thought I was an awful awful cook. I got into my thirties not learning how to cook and finding it all super incomprehensible and completely beyond me. In retrospect, a lot of this came from my having this slightly bizarre perception that everyone else could just....cook. They magically knew how to look at a bunch of stuff that happened to be sitting in the kitchen and would say "this will make a stew. I'll just add some herbs" and all that felt hugely beyond me. The reality, as far as I can tell, is that actually, pretty much every starts with recipes. And, more than that, I think for me what helped was realising that it's way way way easier to start with one cook book, or equivalent.
Most cooks seem to design their recipes based on a few simple principles. Those are not always the same principles - some may love roux sauce as a base, others are big fans of 'if in doubt, add something to mayo'. And switching between a load of different cook books or random recipes on the internet is harder as you're constantly having to learn new tricks. Whereas if you stick with one writer, you can pick up their core foundation stones and build from there.
For me, my primary cook book is my Gousto folder (which is like a cook book). Gousto, itself, was a massive help in terms of getting me cooking by sending me boxes with everything. Now I am more sporadic in getting the boxes, but the recipes I use near daily. And they work for me. I know the building blocks behind that particular philosophy of cookery and I generally don't mess it up. I would also add Rose Elliott - Not Just A Load Of Old Lentils which is the first cookery book I had as a teen and used to cook with when mum was alive. And those are my basic building blocks of cookery. They are the recipe writers I've been trained to follow. I do not pretend to have an intuitive grasp of food.
I just know how to do what I'm told and a couple of paths to follow.
Life hack lesson three - write stuff down
This is probably the faddy bit of my list of lifehacks. See, I've found, that for me, my bullet journal was a total game changer. Mostly because it wasn't electronic. It wasn't an app. It was a physical object that sat in my bag and I physically wrote stuff down in it. The act of physically writing made the to do lists, and good habits more concrete, and to cross them out felt like more of a definite act of failure than just deleting something out of a spreadsheet or word document. The limited space meant I had to be more realistic about what I could commit to doing and couldn't write 20 item to do lists, but then had to see them through.
This structure gave me a way to manage my life, a way to manage my diet, to not double book as much, to manage finances, and to take medication regularly. Generally, all the things I've been bad at. I mean, it drained my finances with my mass purchase of stickers but I do like making it look pretty too, and the process of doing that means I'm regularly taking stock of my life and being mindful about how it hangs together. All that is good.
I know bullet journals are a bit trendy and don't work for everyone, but they really really work for me.
Life hack lesson four - use a night light
This probably only works for people who have nightmares or assorted sleep related crazy, but I think this is genuinely a massive thing in terms of managing my mental health. A soft night light sounds kind of childish (I know some people who genuinely seem to find them almost offensively ridiculous) but for me they provide me with the capacity to get a good night's sleep (v important) while also giving me enough light that I am not badly shaken or disoriented when I wake up from weird dreams. Which means I sleep, and wake up sane.
It's a really little thing, but I'm told it's not that unusual for people who suffer from nightmares or vivid dreams and it really makes a massive difference in managing my crazy and keeping me stable.
Life hack lesson five - own a string of pearls
This probably just my being incredibly middle class, but I love my pearl necklace (shush! No sniggering!). It's a silly thing, but I love the look of it around my neck. It makes me feel grown up, and oddly, it makes me not worry about my grey hairs or the fact I'm a bit podgier than I used to be because pearls make me feel like that is distinguished. It makes me feel like I'm aiming to be a Dowager Countess (Maggie Smith, you're my role model here) and that's cool enough. And then I feel competent and content with being older.
That kind of confidence is worth way more than the pearls. I wear them for big meetings at work, for interviews, and special occasions. And I always feel better when I wear them.
So, those are my random life hacks and objects that help me pretend to be an adult. What are yours?
no subject
Date: 2017-09-04 12:33 am (UTC)I also love the idea of bullet journals, but would want to make them super pretty so would put off actually using them for fear of messing them up. Or forgetting to take it with me, and then everything falling apart(TM).
Along related lines though, I do use a virtual todo list, and that has helped me appear like a grownup. Whilst there is too much on there to actually do, and I do sometimes feel overwhelmed by all the things I am not doing, there are a number of things I have only had the 'togetherness' to do because there was a simple physical next action already written out for me. I therefore seem externally to be much more together than it feels on the inside.
As for other things that help me fake being a grownup? Hmm.. I have a few clothes that secretly feel like ventrue costume, but when I wear them, other people seem to think I am a professional. And on similar lines I also have a grownup handbag that I use sometimes when i mean biznezz.
no subject
Date: 2017-09-04 01:56 pm (UTC)With regards to bullet journals – I can’t draw at all, but I have stickers instead. Many stickers. Too many stickers. Jez has been known to suggest that when I die he will not bury me – he will burn me on a giant funeral pyre of adorable organisational stickers. The discovery you could buy whole a4 sheets of printable sticker paper you print things onto and then cut out was also a dark day for me and sticker hoarding. I could design my own stickers in photoshop!
Your handbag of power sounds awesome. I totally know what you mean by costume too – I think that’s what my pearls are for. I put them on, look at myself in the mirror and think ‘Sibyl Ramkin – GO’ and then everything makes more sense.
no subject
Date: 2017-09-04 09:59 pm (UTC)HAHAHA! I love it!
I would also love to see some pics of your sticker laden bullet journal... (and your pile of stickers)